Have you ever tired so hard to figure something out that it just got harder to think about as you put more effort into it?
That is just about the way I have been feeling lately about a few things. I really needed to know why this all happens when I don't think that I can understand it any more. I want to know why I feel left out or less fortunate when I see some friends have fun.. why can't I just be glad for them? Enjoy their happiness even if I'm not directly a part of it? I think at times it is more like the stark realization that I need to become a bit more in control of my Sensitive feelings. Not so much in a stiffling way but a more responsable and dignified way to approach things. Perhaps less sensing and feeling yet more understanding and thought through, maybe that could help me avoid impulsive emotional responses to the little things that seem to be able to trigger me.
In all of this I find it interesting to see that I do have a unique way of dealing with my poignant emotional responses to almost trivial things. I know that I have been a bit foolish in the past letting the moment run off with me before I could catch up witht he rest of the situations, but hey, I'm still only human. I can only do the best I can do. That's all I should have to expect from myself. Granted there is room for growth that comes with times and experience as well as internal strivings of improvement.
Well, its time to go so I'll be signing off!
